In this fake, satirical article, The Onion imagines that the MTA has finally had enough complaints about service failures and overcrowding on the New York subway. Vulgarities ensue.
"In response to numerous complaints regarding recent delays and route changes to the city’s public transportation system, Metropolitan Transportation Authority officials at a press conference Monday reminded residents that they can [redacted] walk," according to a fake news article by The Onion.
New York City is lucky to have the gold standard in U.S. public transit systems, a point that an MTA spokesperson is happy to point out: "We apologize to anyone frustrated by interruptions in service of our incredibly intricate 24-hour transportation system that provides fast commutes in relative ease and comfort…"
That's pretty much all of the quotes in the article without a veritable cornucopia of foul language more familiar on the streets and in the subways of New York rather than on the pages of Planetizen. Proceed with duly noted caution.
FULL STORY: MTA Reminds New Yorkers They Can Fucking Walk
Friday Funny: The Onion Satirizes the Federal Government’s Electric Car Fetish
The totally satirical, not-at-all-real website The Onion is back with another planning-related fake news take.
New York Needs Permeable Streets to Mitigate Future Flooding
To reduce the severity of disruptive subway flooding, the city can implement street-level solutions that absorb and redirect water before it reaches the train tunnels.
Why New York City's Flooding Its Own Subway Entrances
MTA reassured disoriented New Yorkers that it's flooding subway entrances on purpose, to test barriers that it hopes will guard the system against another Sandy.
Planetizen Federal Action Tracker
A weekly monitor of how Trump’s orders and actions are impacting planners and planning in America.
The state-sanctioned urbicide of Austin
People don’t kill cities. Freeways do.
US to reduce Colorado River water deliveries to Mexico
A new Colorado Treaty amendment reduces Mexico’s Colorado River water allocation by 250,000 acre feet.
5 New England states march closer to 800 megawatt wind energy project
Securing federal approval for the project may be complicated under the Trump administration, which has historically been hostile towards domestic wind power.
Baltimore to break ground on $50 million Transit Priority Project
The project will bring faster bus trips, safer streets and better bike connections to Baltimore.
Airbnb launches $250 million 'last-dollar financing' housing accelerator, makes first investment in Austin
The company will put $6.4 million towards affordable housing development in Texas’ capital.
FREE Course: Walkable City 1: Why Walkability?
After describing his path towards focusing on walkability as the essence of good planning, Jeff Speck marches through his five principal reasons for making more walkable places.
Reinventing Malls: Planning Alchemy—Turning Gray Fields Into Gold
The course focuses on the opportunities and imperatives that shape reinvention of mall sites.
Eagle County Government
Harvard University Graduate School of Design
Nashville Planning Department
The Architects Foundation
University of Cincinnati Online
The Pocatello Development Authority
The Urban Renewal Agency of the City of Pocatello
Journal of the American Planning Association