Christmas Funny: Snowmen Protest Global Warming

On this winter holiday, it's important to remind each other of the overlooked victims of global warming: the world's snowmen and snowwomen. Read this classic, but no less relevant, story from the satirical newspaper The Onion.

1 minute read

December 25, 2013, 1:00 PM PST

By Jonathan Nettler @nettsj


Protesting Snowmen

Lena / flickr

"Braving balmy temperatures and sunny skies, millions of scarfless snowmen and snowwomen gathered in cities across the world Tuesday to raise public awareness about the heavy toll global warming is taking on their health and well-being," reports The Onion.

"Joe Centigrade, president of the Advocates For Beings Of Frozen Precipitation, spoke at a mass rally Tuesday on Washington's National Mall"

"'The unseasonably warm winters of the recent past are a clear indication of a real environmental threat to humans and their frozen simulacra,' said Centigrade, his coals arranged in a frowning pattern. 'As snowmen and snowwomen, we accept the inevitability of melting, but the actions of man are causing us to evaporate well before our time.'"


Wednesday, December 25, 2013 in The Onion

portrait of professional woman

I love the variety of courses, many practical, and all richly illustrated. They have inspired many ideas that I've applied in practice, and in my own teaching. Mary G., Urban Planner

I love the variety of courses, many practical, and all richly illustrated. They have inspired many ideas that I've applied in practice, and in my own teaching.

Mary G., Urban Planner

Cover CM Credits, Earn Certificates, Push Your Career Forward

Logo for Planetizen Federal Action Tracker with black and white image of U.S. Capitol with water ripple overlay.

Planetizen Federal Action Tracker

A weekly monitor of how Trump’s orders and actions are impacting planners and planning in America.

3 hours ago - Diana Ionescu

Person wearing mask walking through temporary outdoor dining setup lined with bistro lights at dusk in New York City.

Restaurant Patios Were a Pandemic Win — Why Were They so Hard to Keep?

Social distancing requirements and changes in travel patterns prompted cities to pilot new uses for street and sidewalk space. Then it got complicated.

June 19, 2025 - Diana Ionescu

Aerial view of town of Wailuku in Maui, Hawaii with mountains in background against cloudy sunset sky.

Maui's Vacation Rental Debate Turns Ugly

Verbal attacks, misinformation campaigns and fistfights plague a high-stakes debate to convert thousands of vacation rentals into long-term housing.

July 1, 2025 - Honolulu Civil Beat

Aerial view of new neifhborhood under construction with enpty lots in foreground.

In California Battle of Housing vs. Environment, Housing Just Won

A new state law significantly limits the power of CEQA, an environmental review law that served as a powerful tool for blocking new development.

4 hours ago - CALmatters

Low-rise Pearl Sreet mall in Boulfer, Colorado.

Boulder Eliminates Parking Minimums Citywide

Officials estimate the cost of building a single underground parking space at up to $100,000.

5 hours ago - Boulder Reporting Lab

Two-story buildings with porches in walkable Florida neighborhood.

Orange County, Florida Adopts Largest US “Sprawl Repair” Code

The ‘Orange Code’ seeks to rectify decades of sprawl-inducing, car-oriented development.

6 hours ago - CNU Public Square