California Redevelopment Officials Suffering Redevelopment Withdrawal

"I just want to build a pocket park! Why won't anyone let me build a pocket park?" one man could be heard screaming from his padded cell in this new treatment facility. Officials in the hospital have struggled to find ways to calm former officials like this man, who once controlled hundreds of millions of dollars for development projects in his community and now have been left with no work to do. The identities of the roughly 20 patients in the hospital have been kept secret.

The disorder is brand new, according to mental health officials who pinpoint its emergence to February 1, the date California's redevelopment agencies officially ceased to exist in accordance with a law signed by Governor Jerry Brown. Symptoms include delusions of approving a community center, acute inclusionary zoningitis, and repeated speeches at imagined project opening ceremonies.

The treatment facility, ironically, was part of a newly opened hospital project built with redevelopment money.