The Onion

Doyle Redland reports on the accidental new construction, which has galvanized both sides of the preservation vs. access argument.

An Al Queda spokesperson says that they refuse to attack any U.S. bridges or any part of the transportation system because they're already in such a poor state no one will notice.

Theodore Tremelstam argues that the United States desperately needs to develop alternate sources of fuel, awakening his buddy Bill at 3 o'clock in the morning in this Point/Counterpoint.

The Onion reports on how President Obama's ambitious high-speed rail agenda is being replaced with a plan for high-speed buses that will use existing roads and be outfitted for a fraction of the cost of trains [Video].

The satirical newspaper The Onion reports on how the safe transfer of millions of barrels of oil into the energy infrastructure of the United States will result in environmental calamity.

A family elder tells tales of the old ways when the family was "not enticed by the frappucinos at the Starbucks that just opened," and there were park-and-rides as far as the eye could see.

This article from The Onion looks at the Environmental Protection Agency's increasing frustration with a global environment that is not playing its part in environmental protection.

Audio advertisement from The Onion highlights how the new magazine "Demographer Today" will present data about people for people interested in data about people.

The Department of Transportation has released a new report urging drivers to combat traffic congestion by honking -- a method estimated to relieve 90% of traffic.

The Onion reports on the "window-shattering ceremony" officially opening Detroit's newest slum, a neighborhood designed with the "latest in high-risk, hopelessly impoverished housing options."

This piece from The Onion presents the incredibly simple solution to the nation's economic troubles: build more houses.

The Onion reports on an "area man" whose decision to live in his parents' basement looks like a wise move.

This just in from The Onion.

The Onion reports on a study showing that a vast majority of Americans want further investments in public transit so everyone else can get off the road and make their drive faster.

The recent housing slump is now showing its face in the "creepy mansion" market, where sales have plummeted, according to this article from The Onion.

Facing a tight budget, officials in California have found an innovative way to mix uses and save money -- by combining a zoo and a prison into one efficient facility.

A lot of power comes with the title of County Surveyor. Lucky for the people of Wayne County, Maryland, elected county surveyor Robert Pelaski vows not to let this awesome power get to his head.

The nation's gentrified neighborhoods are threatened by new trend.

This Onion TV news segment highlights Chinese pride in the country's status as the world's top producer of air pollution

The Onion reports on an innovative new infrastructure plan from DOT: self-cleaning special lanes for reckless drivers.