High Speed Rail Funding Dedicated Solely to Disneyland Monorail Improvements

The entire $8 billion set aside in the federal stimulus plan for high speed rail has been dedicated towards improvements on the Disneyland Monorail, a 2.5-mile train system in Anaheim, California.

The $8 billion infusion is expected to bring broad improvements to the system, which is used by more than 200 people a day. Secretary of Transportation Ray LaHood pushed for the allocation, and says the funding will slash travel times between the lobby of the Disneyland Hotel and the front gates of the theme park from 7 minutes to 3.2 seconds.

"There is no other place in this country where anyone really needs to get anywhere quickly besides Disneyland. There's so many rides!" said Mr. LaHood, in between bites of cotton candy. "The park's only open 16 hours a day. Why waste time on travel between the hotel and the fun?"

Commuters in Southern California and the Northeast Corridor applauded the move, praising the Department of Transportation for enabling more "alone time" in their cars during rush hour.

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