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Friday Funny: Beaver Falls Prey To Analysis Paralysis

Posted by: David Gest
Thanks to: Benjamin Cromie
28 April 2006 - 2:00pm

Dam builder Dennis Messner has overanalyzed his upcoming construction project, calling himself an "integration-minded postmodernist". Pretty advanced thinking for a beaver.

"HUNTSVILLE, ONTARIO -- Local beaver Dennis Messner is spending an inordinate amount of time and effort in the planning and construction phases of building his dam, according to neighbors close to the project.

In the past four months, Messner, 4, has visited hundreds of other dams and drawn up detailed and extensive blueprints. He has researched topics ranging from advanced dome acoustics to the near-extinction of the North American beaver in the early 20th century, and plans to incorporate much of his research into his design."

Full Story: Beaver Overthinking Dam
Source: The Onion, April 19, 2006
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Even if the report overestimates the costs by a factor of two and underestimates the tax-benefit by a similar amount, the conclusion would be pretty much the same: destination resorts cost local government and taxpayers money.
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